Jewish Wives Stay in Abusive Relationships Longer

During a groundbreaking seminar held last week on International Women’s Day, the findings of a study revealed some shocking news: Jewish victims of domestic violence stay in abusive relationships longer than average!

Since Jewish women tend to be highly educated and have more opportunities for a career, I suspect victims are not staying due a lack of funds. I think victims are staying because of fear—fear of the abuser, fear of disgrace, fear of critical reactions, and fear of being blamed for not trying hard enough.

The Jewish community has always placed a high value on family. While that’s a wonderful thing, it can also cause tremendous pressure, leading many to pretend that everything’s fine when clearly it is not.

If a wife is being abused by her husband, she is not at fault! There is no shame in leaving someone who is cruel, mean, and unsafe to live with. If a family can stay intact, that’s obviously preferred, but not if it means sacrificing the mental, physical, and emotional health of those involved.

Instead of shaming others, judging them, and gossiping, we need to express more sensitivity. I won’t pretend that I haven’t engaged in that type of negative behavior, especially the gossip, but it’s not helpful for anyone. Let’s all make an effort to reach out to someone who’s hurting. With victims of abuse, it will often take multiple attempts. Yes, we’re all tired and busy; I get it. It’s hard to find the time, but these ladies deserve our time, our help, and our friendship.

This problem has always flourished because of the secrecy. Talking about it in the open is a big step forward.

Would You Pay $1,000 for a Purim Basket?

$1,000 for a Purim basket… No, it’s not a joke, it’s real. I’ve seen some expensive holiday gifts before, but this deserves a prize! How did I hear of such luxury, you may be asking? From a friend who lives in a very exclusive community in Westchester, NY. According to her, said basket was purchased in multiples by someone in her book group.

The list of included items is breathtaking:

  • 12 Coffees
  • 2 Champagne Bottles
  • Truffles
  • Chocolate Cherries
  • Chocolate Tubes
  • Mint, Chocolate and Caramel Balls
  • Mixed Nuts
  • Fudge
  • Gourmet Popcorn
  • Candy
  • Fruit
  • Peanut Clusters
  • Pretzels

The package alone weighs 50 pounds and could feed a small army, let alone a single soul!

Now, I truly don’t care how another person spends their own money, but I do wonder if a $1,000 basket provides more joy than a $10.00 or $100.00 basket? From my own experience, I’ve never known anyone—especially a kid—to reject a gift based on cost. Normally, I just cobble together free or discounted candy purchased after Valentine’s Day and a few cheapies special to the recipient. I wouldn’t say my baskets are extravagant by any means, but they’re always enjoyed! 

There’s no denying that we’d all love to be given a $1,000 gift on Purim or any other day of the year. Regardless, I’m sure that a lovely present can be made, no matter how small a budget may be, based on the creator’s determination and ingenuity.

A celebration is not about money, after all! It’s supposed to be about family, friends, faith, fun, and LOVE. Getting caught up in a social circle that only focuses on conspicuous consumption is not festive, it’s empty. Gifts are great, but we should never feel obligated to spend, spend, spend because another person goes overboard.

 

Holidays are meant to be joyous, but should there be a limit on spending?

Super Savings Saturday – 3/11/17

Welcome to another edition of Super Savings Saturday.

This was a fantastic week for shopping. I only had time for 2 stores, but was able to find everything I wanted in stock, with lots of discounted produce, freebies, and moneymakers!

Rite Aid:

2 Kleenex tissues, sale price $0.99. I stacked a $1.00/2 store coupon with 2 $0.30 manufacturer’s coupons. Total: $0.38 plus $0.75 Checkout 51 Rebate!

Teddy Grahams Go-Paks, sale price $0.99. Total: $0.99 plus $1.00 Checkout 51 Rebate!

2 Crest Complete toothpastes, sale price $3.00. I stacked a $2.00 store coupon with 2 $1.00 manufacturer’s coupons. Total: $2.00 plus $3.00 Plenti Points!

Local Produce Store:

This particular place always has a big table in the back that’s dedicated to clearance fruits and veggies. There’s no way to know in advance what’s available, but I always manage to find something worthwhile.

Bag of 12 limes, sale price $0.99!

Bag of 8 grapefruits, sale price $0.89!

Bag of 7 Meyer lemons, sale price $0.89!

Bag of mixed red and white potatoes, sale price $0.99! (Since potatoes are cheap anyway, I probably should’ve skipped this one since 3 of them were moldy. I peeled/diced the remainder and made a big pot of mashed potatoes and a big bowl of potato salad. Both tasted fine.)

1 cucumber, sale price $0.39 plus $0.25 Checkout 51 rebate!

Checkout 51 Home

 

Have you found an amazing deal lately? I’d love to hear about it!

Actually She Can: Empowering Professional Women

Sad but true: Even though women earn 58% of college degrees and make up the majority of the work force, we are still significantly under-represented in leadership positions.

Actually She Can, an empowerment campaign for professional women, recently created an excellent infographic about this important issue, with ways we can help to change it! Millennials, in particular, are passionate about closing the gender gap and it will be interesting to see if these influential younger ladies will be able to do it.

Actually She Can also has great articles and mentorship opportunities. Very good site that’s positive and offers real life solutions.