Kids, pets, toys, dirty floors, stacks of dishes, mountains of laundry—family life can seem like one big mess! Sometimes I get so exhausted, so distracted and so overwhelmed, all I can do is pray (and cry). The truth is that having a family is a mixed blessing; there are good days, bad days, and really bad days. By controlling the chaos and sticking to a reasonable plan, we can make a tough job a bit less challenging.

Here are 15 tips for a cleaner and calmer home:

1. Adequate Trash Cans – Meaning one in every single room of the house.

2. Adequate Hampers – Have one for dirty laundry in every bedroom and bathroom. If multiple children share a room, provide their own hampers.

3. Designated Space – “A place for everything and everything in its place” is the best advice. No more wasted time searching. 

4. Declutter – Be merciless in this area and avoid hanging on to duplicates, sentimental items and “just in case” stuff. Some folks even cling to broken toys and ripped clothes out of fear! If you haven’t used it in a year, the odds are good you will never miss it. (Obviously, there are a few exceptions like seasonal items needed for holidays.)

5. Don’t Buy More – How many of us have multiple shoes, purses and identical black sweaters, yet we crave another one? Try to use what you already have.

6. Quick Clean in Blocks – Sometimes the thought of cleaning an entire house, from top to bottom, is so overwhelming, we feel paralyzed. Set a timer for 15 minutes and tackle one project like cleaning out a draw, a shelf, etc. If you wait for the “perfect” time, chances are that the time will never come! Once the kids are down for the night, spend a half hour tidying up without interruptions.

7. Don’t hide it – Pushing stuff under the bed, cramming it into a closet, or packing more junk into a garage isn’t cleaning, it’s delaying.

8. Separate Toys – I have a strict policy about toys: outside toys must stay outside and inside toys must stay inside. No bikes in the living room, no stuffed animals in the yard. Try to remove toys from the common areas (living room, kitchen, dining room) overnight.

9. Storage Bins – These are a lifesaver, especially for moms with multiple children. Kids can be very territorial. By giving everyone their own storage bin, it keeps fighting to a minimum. Label by name for older kids and by color before they can read. I have found that having many small bins, rather than 1 big one, actually works better.

10. Everyone Pitches In – Since the whole family lives in the home, it is everyone’s responsibility to help keep it clean. Teach children from an early age to clean up their own mess. Husbands may also need constant reminders. Be patient and praise often, rather than just criticize. 

11. Assign Chores – This should be done fairly, with age and ability kept in mind. Chores aren’t meant to be a punishment, it’s about teaching responsibility. Teaching takes time and effort, but it’s an investment that will pay off when your teen does the laundry and cooks dinner. 

12. Public Rooms vs. Private Rooms – I can tolerate more mess in bedrooms than I can in the living room, especially if we’re having company over. Very few people will look at the laundry room, but everyone will need the bathroom. Prioritize!

13. Extreme Husbands – The majority of men tend to be complete slobs or excessively neat. (Mine is definitely the former.) It’s impossible to change someone. Constant encouragement, however, can work—somewhat. Not a day goes by when I’m not saying “Pick up your socks” or “Take the trash out.” That’s just life and I’ve accepted him. 

14. Daily vs. Sporadically – Most of us have limited time, limited energy, and limited interest in cleaning. Focus your effort on needs rather than wants. We all need fresh laundry and washed dishes. Polishing silver and waxing floors? Not so much. 

15. Be Realistic – Each of us is in a different season of life. Each of us is facing a different challenge. Moms with newborns and toddlers will have a much harder time than Empty Nesters. Don’t hold yourself to an impossible standard. Ask for help and if you can afford it, hire someone. There is no shame in that! 

How do you keep your home—and family—clean and organized?

Meet Josie, a temporary addition to the family. This precious fur baby arrived nine days ago, in very rough shape. Her journey in life has been a difficult one so far—homeless, alone, and extremely ill. Someone found her behind a dumpster, and thankfully a rescue group stepped in and saved her. After initial treatment to stabilize her condition, she was available to foster and I couldn’t say no. 

With beautiful black coloring, white paws, and a white mustache, she is one of the prettiest little kitties I’ve ever seen, with a sweet personality to match. She loves to lay on my lap and be hand-fed from a bottle. (I’m waking up every 3 hours, for round-the-clock feedings, but it’s ok.)

I would gladly keep her forever, but she will be moving on soon to another family. Though it rips my heart out to have to give her back, I am grateful to be a part of her world, even if it’s just for a little while. Josie is an angel.

Whenever someone tells me that they want a new pet, I always encourage them to adopt, rather than shop. There are so many animals in need. Older ones or those with health issues have a much harder time finding a forever family. I have many pets and I also enjoy fostering from time to time. The love and joy that these little guys provide is truly priceless. Josie is in demand as a kitten, of course, but fostering a senior is equally rewarding. 

If you’re able to foster, it’s so worth it! 

Travel can be exciting and it can also be a huge hassle. Having just returned from 4 days on Cape Cod, I’m wondering if it was worth the effort. Don’t get me wrong, I am very grateful to experience any vacation at all, but our timing was unbelievably bad.

Between a record-setting heat wave, 4th of July and enormous crowds, there was a lot of fussing and fighting. Normally, we don’t travel during holidays, but we were part of an extended family group and this was the only week everyone could do it. 

As a family, we made a list of ideas that sounded appealing; I say “ideas” because I’ve learned that you have to be flexible while traveling, since nothing ever goes perfectly. These included a day at an Inflatable Park, a Whale Watch, renting bicycles, and the beach. (Yes, we kept it super simple, with modest expectations.)

While we actually did manage to accomplish all of the above, and a lot more, it wasn’t smooth sailing.

High point of the trip: Eating 3-scoop ice cream cones while listening to a free live music show, with everyone in a good mood and relaxed.

Low point of the trip: Severe sunburns, near fainting from heat exhaustion, and one person who threw up from eating too many hot dogs—all in the same day!

The second low point was during the ride home when we were trying to cross the Bourne Bridge for almost 3 hours, which turned a long-ish ride into a marathon of misery. You can probably tell from this map how far it was, going from the very tip of the Cape back towards the mainland, and being stuck for hours on the road. 

I’ll admit that a lot of cross words were exchanged during that tense ride. Some of them, in particular, I really wish I could take back now. I was literally at my breaking point—hot, tired, hungry, annoyed, and sick of the endless noise. Definitely not my finest moment…

Setting the difficulties aside, Cape Cod is a beautiful place that’s worth visiting. I’ve been there at least half a dozen times during my life and the scenery never disappoints. For anyone who may be interested, I did the majority of my planning with We Need A Vacation, which is an excellent website devoted to the Cape and Islands. Lots of good tips on lodging, dining, and activities.

My favorite meal was a cod dinner at a seafood restaurant. It had lemon and capers and was served with mashed potatoes and asparagus. Oh, and did I mention that I ate five pieces of bread from the basket? It was so good! 

The usual tourist stuff is fun, especially on the first trip, and I love the antique stores, art galleries, and clothing boutiques. Prices are high, overall, but a souvenir is a must. I found the prettiest scarf with a nautical theme that will be enjoyed for years to come. 

I guess it’s true that trips really are a mixed blessing. I’m happy I went, but I wouldn’t want to relive it any time soon. 

Have you been on a vacation lately? Was it a success or a disaster?

Every 4th of July, we have fun making Fireworks in a Jar. Some call it an art project; others say it’s a science experiment. Whichever way you view it, this is truly one of the quickest and easiest activities of all time because you only need oil, water, a jar or glass, and food coloring. 

Using red and blue food coloring makes it more festive, but anything you have on hand is fine. Little kids—and big ones!—will find it delightful.